“The Green Inferno”

Green Inferno

Star Lorena Izzo next to director Eli Roth.

“The Green Inferno” is “Hostel” (2005) in a jungle. Half way through the movie, I couldn’t tell if director/writer Eli Roth was playing it safe with his formulaic writing, or if he let his ego get the best of him. You know what you’re in for when there’s a character held captive who rubs one out so he can “think straight.”

“The Green Inferno” is Roth’s first film in eight years (last one was “Hotel: Part II” (2007)) and it stars Lorena Izzo (Roth’s off-screen wife) as Justine. Justine’s a horror archetypal innocent college student who joins a horror archetypal douchebag’s activist group to fly to the Amazon and protest against a mining company that’s destroying an ancient tribe’s village. They soon find themselves as the entree for the villagers they’re trying to help after their plane crashes.

Roth said in an interview that he imagined “The Green Inferno” as if “Cannibal Holocaust” (1979) was made by Terrence Malick (“The Thin Red Line” (1998)) and Werner Herzog (“Rescue Dawn” (2007)). Difference between Roth and his influences are that his influences have clear vision and taste. I like tasteless movies, but Roth is on par with Michael Bay in terms of  being unbearably tasteless.

SPOILER ALERT FROM HERE ON!!!

Here’s some of the scenarios we’re forced to watch in “The Green Inferno” – the archetyal stoner almost gets his penis bitten by a tarantula whilst peeing in bushes. In a later scene, we watch him get eaten by cannibals who have the munchies while he yells, “They got the munchies!”

I also wonder if Izzo sees anything perverse in her husband’s choice in filming her run in bra and panties covered in tribal makeup, avoiding the danger of genital mutilation. That happens at least twice in this movie!

Oh, and let’s not forget the film’s atrocious final act! Deus ex-machina, an anti-climactic resolution, a false jump scare nightmare sequence, a half-assed mid-credits sequence, and the main character saying the gunman who saved her were the bad guys and the tribe was nice to her? What a mess!

I’ll probably watch “The Green Inferno” again when it comes to Netflix, but that’s only with a group of friends and a case of beer to power through this juvenile disaster.

Grade: D

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